A while back I asked, "What are you scared of?" Here's my career fear: I am scared that I will forever be "just mediocre" as "The Career Encourager." I'm not so much scared of being a crashing failure. Failure and recovery is the American way! I'm certainly not scared of being a raging success - that's a great part of the American way. But I am afraid of being mediocre - of not doing anything exciting or special - of not fully using my talents - of forever being stuck in the lather-rinse-repeat phase of work.
Part of this fear comes from my upbringing, no doubt. People with my background - especially girls - just aren't supposed to make it big in a white collar world. I think part of this fear also comes from a media-saturated world where every story is a dramatic story of triumph and achievement. The business publications have picked up on this and report tales of incredible entrepreneurship where the protagonists are amazing, and laser sharp, and incredibly globally conscious and a host of other over-the-top descriptors guaranteed to make me feel like a schmuck because I can't even seem to manage drop off for 2 kids at 2 different schools and get through the basics in my in-box without trauma.
Some time ago uber blogger Penelope Trunk coined the nifty phrase "mommy porn" to describe the glossy multi-page photo spreads the entertainment magazines do on Hollywood moms. I wonder if industry magazines haven't also gone the route of "business porn" with their over-the-top portrayals of business professionals who seamlessly track and forecast trends, create new markets, and become "thought leaders."
I could go on about where my fear of mediocrity comes from, but that would simply lead to a condition that Ann Bares once hilariously described as "slow death by self-introspection." Instead I will concentrate on how to overcome this fear of mediocrity. My plan includes:
Get busy! The Director of Sales at my favorite client company likes to tell his team "Activity defeats doubt." Sitting around and self-introspecting isn't going to get me anywhere, and my to-do list is miles long and already in priority order so it's not like I don't know what needs to be done.
Eliminate distractions! The election is over so that's one big distractor gone. I made the decision to change my Internet homepage from msn.com to a site focused on spiritual development. Amazing the amount of distraction and stress it has removed from my life in just a short time!
Start small! Finish this blog posting. File the stuff that's been sitting on my credenza for the past month. Most of these small things are also distractions, and eliminating then frees up energy for me to use on more worthwhile activities.
Make sure each small task is connected to a bigger goal. Do I really need to read that particular magazine article? D I really need to stay connected with that person? Do I really need to keep those files? If I find myself unable to stop doing something, and yet it's not connected to a larger goal, perhaps I should re-think my larger goals!
Do one scary thing a day! Pick up the phone and schedule one networking meeting. Meet with the business lawyer to talk about setting up the corporation. Each item on its own is not scary once started.
Spend time with my encouragers. I've said it over and over - know who your top 5 encouragers are and spend time with them. Last week I was in a situation where I had to spend time with 2 people who routinely discourage me. One was a work situation where I had no choice so I just had to see it through. The other was a social situation that I voluntarily entered out of habit. Not a good decision on my part. This Friday I have a fun book swap event planned and some of my top encouragers will be there so I am reallly looking forward to that!
I think that's a good list to get me started. Interesting to note that most of these items actually fall into the "lather-rinse-repeat" category. None of them are big. They are ongoing, mediocre tasks. Yet, when accomplished with excellence, I believe that the sum total of these tasks can add up to a great career.
What other "mediocre" items do you think I should add to the list?
I completely agree that society has become obsessed with extreme success in all its forms. There are many "reality" shows that are so completely stupid (in my mind) that perpetuate this "Everything has to be a big deal!" mentality. No. It doesn't. I'm trying to enjoy the little things. If I am the only one to notice and cheer myself on, then so be it. I'd hate to be a kid growing up surrounded by all this!
I love all the steps of your plan. Great advice! You go for it Career Encourager!
Posted by: MMG | November 18, 2008 at 07:43 PM
My husband once suggested I be "intellectually dimmer." Basically, stop thinking so much. We are our own worst enemies. I do not have anything to add to the list but would highlight spending time with encouragers and when they tell you you are doing great - believe them. Jackie Cameron has a great post at Consult Cameron about taking a long time to be an overnight success that is really great. There are so many starts, stops and setbacks to achievements - unfortunately more people are not willing to share that behind the scenes look in favor of the glossy approach. Ah, I have one kid and one school and am challenged so you are that far ahead of me :) Oh, Jackie also linked to a great coaching post yesterday about good things being difficult. I sent it to work and will be keeping this one close by myself. Hang in there!
Posted by: Lisa | November 19, 2008 at 04:35 AM
Great post and a great list. I wonder if part of the fear of mediocrity comes from our unreasonable and unrealistic definitions of success (i.e., as promoted through mommy and business porn). Why can't we see the simple act of bringing a measure of good into the world every day - through career encouragement, for example - as a shining success? Maybe our standards are just way off?!
Posted by: Ann Bares | November 19, 2008 at 04:19 PM
You are tagged at http://hrmanager.squarespace.com/journal/2008/11/20/freeze-tag.html. Play if you like!
Posted by: Lisa | November 19, 2008 at 06:59 PM
I put myself in the afraid of being mediocre column too. I want to set the world on fire with helping people work happy. Sometimes I get upset that I'm not further ahead, but then I remind myself that I'm taking those small steps and they are already paying off.
Great post! I really have to make sure that every little thing I do helps out my larger goals.
Posted by: Karl Staib - Work Happy Now | November 19, 2008 at 10:03 PM
Great post. Solid. To understand the struggles that are internal that keep success from your career is a large step forward. Most people do not investigate themselves enough to know what makes the successful or not. Nice writing.
Posted by: Jason Monastra | November 20, 2008 at 06:43 AM
We must spend time with people that will help us fulfill our greatness. If we hang out with low life people then we will compare ourselves to them and live like them. If we hang out with intelligent and loving people that is the life we will cultivate for ourselves.
I try to call or spend time with people who are positive and push me to think in new directions. It works. I always get a boost of creativity and take my career to a new level.
Posted by: Karl Staib - Work Happy Now | November 23, 2008 at 11:18 AM